boxfullofzeroes | voicetest the voiceless

voicetest the voiceless

They're not dead.

Less dead than they'd felt, at least. Their shell doesn't normally take so long to reform.

Then again. Their shell doesn't usually break of their own violation as they ascended in a boiling rage, ate at least one realm, a god, and all the Godseekers.

(That last point is debatable, actually. There's some odd sense, deep under their...shell? Void? Wherever they once stored things like Isma's Tear, much deeper now...that the sea-mind is still there, sluggish and held in a stasis. They're already adjusting enough, and they don't seem to be dying or trying to kill them, so that problem is neatly sorted as 'for later'.)

They push their body to stand. Their horn clangs uncomfortably loudly against the grate they've apparently woken up beneath. They're somewhere in the Royal Waterways. A quick check of the map--or, not so quick, as it takes time to locate where it had been--shows they've risen about halfway through, closer to the City of Tears than the White Palace. They'll go to the Stag Station in the City Storerooms next.

So they think. Complications arise on the way.

The Infection is gone, leaving dead Flukes, Pilflips, and Hwurmps in piles enough it takes time to force their way past. Their body seems too small. No, their body is fine--there's something wrong with perception itself. That will take time to adjust to.

Then, they discover the Monarch Wings now stretch and warp when used, twisting around the nearest pipes after landing before the Knight forcibly calls them back. Shade Wings, they decide to call these.

Once they're high enough to hear the rain above, they realize a noise they'd ascribed to water running in the distance is, in fact, something swirling behind their mask. Many somethings. All the fragments of Siblings with enough self left, staring out from their eyes. It's disconcerting.

By the time they actually get out of the Waterways, they're using their Shade Wings to grip ledges and drag themselves up, with those holding onto things better than their own arms are with the Mantis Claw.

The Knight faceplants awkwardly onto the floor of the building Lemm's shop is in. If the City is the same as below, there's little left to try killing them in the area.

They'll just take a moment here, thanks.

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He doesn't laugh, that'd be beyond stupid of him with how he's feeling, but he does take on a very subtly amused look.

"It's true that a Relic Seeker rarely carries a Nail, but you can get some good heft with a Wanderer's Journal, as they say. Maybe you'd fit the part better than you think. Wouldn't that be a picture."

Lemm smooths a hand up to his longer horn, pushing to put pressure on it at certain points. The pulsing in his head fades a bit by the time he runs out of arm. Not squinting hard through a blurry lens an inch from a relic helps more. His hand falls back to the desk and he tilts his head down to regard the Knight with much less of a struggle.

"Besides that, I enjoy your shouting almost as much as I enjoy lining your pockets for relics. Maybe you've noticed, but the shop doesn't get many visitors, and me even less. I'll be stubborn as I like, thank you."

They actually take a moment to imagine this. The idea of not having their Nail is outright disturbing, but a Journal as a weapon--a picture indeed. They could manage it strength-wise, but for their size, it would be quite unwieldy.

(Even when they pause to write, they're taking glances up to make certain he's...not getting worse. That's the best they can go for.)

He gives confirmation of some previous thoughts. That's important, as is the fact that he's said this. They're briefly floored, and honestly moved.

Of course he must enjoy their company. It would've been difficult to go through as much as they had as purely business partners, which they haven't been for a while now.

There's still something about it being told rather than only being implied.

...Has the Knight done the same? No, they have not.

It's good to understand enjoying my visiting is mutual.

They take a long few moments to stare at the paper before finally offering it up. They feel they've phrased that strangely, and they're too unfocused to string word together a better way.

Edited 2022-11-30 16:13 (UTC)

Lemm wasn't sure he'd actually go through with saying that. The veil of ow he's working through definitely made it harder to talk himself out of it - easier just to speak as plainly as possible and not waste the energy. But the truth is he'd been hoping he'd take that courage for a while.

The headache buffer also makes it much easier to keep his demeanour looking steady and unaffected while he waits for the Knight to craft their response.

It has not occurred to Lemm that they might be as muddled as he feels, but the odd sentence is studied with some concentration and the sentiment comes across properly on the second read-through.

Lemm is quiet for a time.

"Of course," he mumbles eventually, and maybe he'd sound more flippant if his eyes weren't fixed so intently on their words. He wants so badly to pluck it from them and put it with the others, but it'd be too obvious. Regardless it is a great effort to keep his hands still. "Ah... hm. How's - how're you and... yours?" Changing the subject slightly. Lemm gestures to the Knight and then... sort of more loosely around them.

From spontaneous visit to concern, they hadn't braced for...this. It's the opposite of small talk, though it could possibly seem adjacent to that from the outside. 'It's good to see you.' 'How are things?' Not for them, nor for him. Not in the circumstances they've had.

The Knight is significantly off-kilter. But they can handle discussing an update.

It appears better than you currently. I've been trying to investigate some dream-related subjects.
Songstress Marissa's spirit is in the Pleasure House. She has memories when she previously seemed to forget most encounters.

That's a simpler subject than the realm they'd partly drowned. Or at least, one less likely to send them down a road of being bothered.

Great to see you too. There's ghosts. It's actually a relief! Lemm doesn't know what he'd have done with a fine, thanks, you? and apparently they both know it.

He is definitely less troubled by this information than someone else might be. The Knight has already informed him of the Dream Nail, and at this point he's got no evidence to refute any of their outlandish claims. It's less worldshaking than finding out the person selling him relics for pocket money is actually a Higher Being and also branded as King and - well, there's a lot. Ghosts are hardly comparative.

"Songstress Marissa... Ah, now that was a famous name around here. Posters don't last, but there's a mural of her by a corner... somewhere east of the Sanctum, I think." A short pause to process, and his fingers stray to his horn again. It ends up looking more like a kind of frank, contemplative gesture than anything pain-relief related, and maybe this was on purpose. "Are you telling me the Pleasure House is haunted? By a performance ghost."

(Asking after him now seems pointless. They're sure they can already tell, hence why they're still fairly up in his space.)

Yes. She's on the stage. Well, presumably her actual body is under it. That's an unpleasant thought they have no requirement to dwell on, and so don't.

She hasn't gone spying on anyone (that is intended reassurance, she hasn't on Lemm; for all they're aware, she might've had stranger habits in life) in the Springs if you have such concerns.

He makes a noise that could be described as whatever keen isn't. On the stage, they tell him. He could have looked right at the spirit without realising just on his first time poking around in there.

"I'd certainly hope not! Would've had to pay an entry fee, anyway. I wouldn't put it past that dratted grifter to try to con a spectre." He sobers quickly. Now probably isn't the time for that sort of thing. "...I don't know much about the dead. Hm - I mean, after the fact. Before then it's half of my job."

Lemm looks thoughtful.

"What else have you found out about... dream subjects, then? I'll admit I'm curious. Hard to find anything on it."

Ugh. They wouldn't put it past Millibelle to try. They'd show their thoughts on that with a flash of their Nail if they weren't so near.

...By now, they figure Lemm likely isn't going to fall right over. The Knight pops up onto the counter properly. They're talking now. In big, shouty writing.

I don't recall what you know or I've told you so far past the Dream Nail's function.

Recently, I was testing if she's the only one who can remember me now, as ~~all~~ nearly all forgot me as soon as I left before the Radiance was gone. Some seem to now if I stay a while. It doesn't always go well, so I'll need to be more careful not to cause upset.
I'm still trying to find the exact reasons why or if it's only myself. It's only in the early stages and won't to be easy to figure out.

He nods along as they write, head balanced on a hand braced against his desk. He's not going to topple. Things are fine (not dying) and very quickly getting finer (way less bad). The fact he's so attentive now should be proof enough he's recovering. He was barely reactive when they walked in.

"...There's poetry about that, I think." Lemm does not move to find any, because he does not have any. The contents of his shelves are memorised. "It's all very enigmatic, but there're underlying themes of regret and..."

He drags a hand down his face. No evidence to go on, here.

"I've never seen a spirit. I wouldn't like to go on conjecture."

Edited (random asterisk get outta here) 2022-11-30 23:47 (UTC)

They vaguely tip their head. They can't call him out as incorrect, though they hadn't been considering such terms. Perhaps they should. Poetry is a use of language that would fit many that linger.

I'd show you if I could. It'd make it easier to know if I'm the cause or not. Hallownest doesn't have many visitors or quick changes for them to notice.

Hm. Something twinges, now, as an unfortunate idea occurs. They debate over mentioning before realizing how cruel that would be. The Knight knows better than to hide the trapped dead's voices away, and Lemm is hardly unused to discomforting topics.

I would prefer if it were my direct presence. Some coming to awareness alone would be unpleasant.

He folds his arms over his desk to get comfortable and gives a cautious shake of the head...

"I can't see what I can't see, Knight." And maybe that's not such a curse. His career is bent around the dead. Even hearing that some folklore may potentially have truth to it is already unsettling enough. The common bug was not meant to know that every grave might be overseen. A Relic Seeker maybe even less so.

He retreats from this subject with what limited grace he has.

"Give... Hm. No, nothing from me, I've got nothing to say to a spirit." Lemm feels comfortable enough with this verdict. "I'll keep digging on Moth folklore, but I've barely found a scrap. You may be on your own with whatever you're chasing here, but if it's worth putting in the record, keep me in the loop." His fingers rap the stack of papers.

...And slide off. This is not business. They said so.

"I'd been meaning to ask." He pretends to study the far wall. It's headache stuff. Never mind that it's wearing off. "We aren't ready for a proper expedition, are we?"

Edited 2022-12-01 00:49 (UTC)

This is reasonable. Frustrating to them, but he has no requirement to get involved, and they were only musing in the first place. (Novel, letting someone read their relatively-idle thoughts.)

Seer is alive, but seems preoccupied with other company, they offer first, before straightening slightly. Right, they'd fully forgotten.

I believe I should scout an area for threats a little while before going through, if that's agreeable. There is somewhere I have you may be interested in, though some crawling will be necessary to get there.

The Knight pauses. They'd found references to her name, but had only thought of her as the Grey Mourner. They stare at the paper, trying to recall. They had, correct?

Being told the Seer may be busy is pretty validating - not wanting to disturb someone is a great excuse for simply not going to see them. Their first line gets a nod. Although he does catch himself wondering - what other company? If the Knight isn't telling, it probably isn't for him to investigate for now. He has been putting certain things off and he does not mind putting them off further.

"I'd agree with you going ahead. I don't want a repeat of last time any more than you do." Lemm's happy with their response. It's basically what he was looking for.

"If you think somewhere'd be relevant to me I've plenty of reason to trust your judgement. My concern, Knight: you said it yourself, we're not used to partnered travel. Before we tackle anywhere too involved -" Fog Canyon or Deepnest or the Abyss, he doesn't say! "- I'd rather get some more practice in. Maybe you've had the same thought."

This nets him several nods. A small flicker of relief, as well; while they didn't truly expect him to want to forge somewhere particularly difficult, it's a good suggestion to have put on the table.

And his open acknowledgement of trusting their judgement is...nice.

(This visit is gathering nearly as many jolts as the last, albeit not so many awful ones.)

I agree. I'm rustier than I realized, even without accounting for how Hallownest is slightly less familiar than it was.

There is a mansion of a Great Knight hidden away. The route is below the Resting Grounds through some narrow tunnels, and the Mansion itself seems safe after I went through. I believe that would fit nicely.

Rustier than they realised. This probably isn't what they mean, he's almost sure they mean with a Nail, but there are certain times they've seemed... off. Now isn't the time to bring that up, either, he decides.

Anyway, he brightens up considerably at the prospect they've just presented.

"A Great Knight... You found where one lived?" Lemm turns with a little too much enthusiasm to examine his shelves, as evidenced by a small wince. "I was on the verge of making those five my focus before you came along. Ah, you do know how to get a Relic Seeker's attention! Yes, we'll go there. It'll be a grand sidetrack while we - acclimatise."

As the headache ebbs, his filter's coming back in force. Still, he can't keep the approving note out of his voice. "What a guide you're turning out to be."

The Knight bows as grandly as one can sitting on a counter. While their certainty as guide was somewhat shaken, their capabilities as explorer never has been, and they're only to practice and improve the former.

They recall his fascination when selling the Hallownest Seals. They're also fairly certain they recall he doesn't know their names, so that won't alleviate the itch of not grasping it. They're uncertain where they could've even heard it.

The Grey Mourner, I called her. Her Mansion is just as grey. She was still around as a spirit(?) and tasked me with bringing a flower to her mantis lover's grave.

They think to draw a sketch of how she looked like when they met. Something, again, itches they've missed a detail. Perhaps further exploration will jog their memory.

Lemm studies the drawing carefully. But there's no flicker of recognition, as much as he wishes it were as simple as having seen her depicted somewhere. It's still more than he's ever had to go on.

"A Great Knight lovelorn, eh? Hallownest's full of hidden tragedy."

There's not much in the way of sympathy in his voice. He may have been stricken with something far heavier upon hearing the Knight's own secrets, but this is far more removed. It's much easier to maintain some emotional distance from history when it's not colliding with him in the present.

"Already you've uncovered more about the five than anyone left behind. Have you any clue why their legacy would be as buried as it is? Did the... spirit tell you much?"

The Knight feels sympathy for the Grey Mourner and the Traitor's Child, certainly. They wouldn't have worked so hard, dashed themselves to pieces just getting to her grave if they did not. Still, they hardly expected Lemm to lean in to that tragedy.

Headshake. She was preoccupied with mourning. Her lover was one of the Traitors, or brought with them as daughter of their Lord, and hidden away in the Queen's Gardens. It's a difficult area to go through even without a diseased tribe trying to kill intruders.

Hesitation as an idea sprouts.

They have no fear of meeting others. When necessary, they have no issue of expressing what they truly want. Lemm is still the only in Hallownest who's gotten full communication from them.

They'll have to expand that eventually, as they have no plan to leave Hallownest any time soon. Another recluse in one of Hallownest's remote places would be reasonable practice in this case.

I can try to find one Great Knight that survives and question him in your stead. You wouldn't want to meet him, the Dung Defender. You kicked me from your shop when I wore the charm I got from him.

('Got'. They stole it after it fell off him, but there's no need to claim guilt.)

Edited 2022-12-01 12:26 (UTC)

The Queen's Gardens... He's seen evidence that they exist, but making the trek to sightsee never interested him quite enough to dare. Sounds like it was probably for the best.

For a second, Lemm looks appropriately shocked to hear that a Great Knight is still living. And then he reads the rest.

"The..." Dung Defender. Say it. "The Dung - that's what that awful smell was? I thought you crawled through something!" Several connections are made in quick succession. Despite the jolt it gives his head, Lemm's face drops despairingly into his hands. "The Waterways," he groans. "Say no more."

It's his luck that the discovery of a living Great Knight would be... like this. As much as history must be gleaned and he would love to be the one to glean it, the Knight is quite right.

Muffled by his hands, he says as much. "...I'd appreciate the go-between - there's no doubt in my mind he has some valuable stories to tell. I'll give you a few questions to pass along sometime." The first one on his mind is why!? It will not be on the list.

They feel very, very slightly bad. Just barely. It's a good thing they aren't quite capable of smelling.

I can go put it on and return, to give you a chance to get used to it. They tilt their head at him innocently.

Lemm's head jerks back up. He looks mortified for all of three seconds. How can he possibly talk his way out of this -

"- Oh, you-!" His expression drops into annoyance and he flicks their paper sharply enough to make a snapping noise. "Barbaric. Go and join your spirit friend on that stage, since you're such an aspiring comedian!"

Got him. They playfully smack Lemm's fingers with the paper right back.

I suppose I did crawl though something. In fact, a great amount of something. The Royal Waterways are quite spacious for what they are.

Lemm reels back and flaps his whole hand at their paper this time, repeatedly, at arm's length.

"Urgh! Stop it! Nauseating information that not a single bug in Hallownest or beyond needs to know - least of all me!" He finishes batting away their words and presses that hand to his forehead instead. "It's no wonder I've a headache, noxious little brute that you are. Bring any of that with you into my shop - or near me ever again, and you will find out how much a Wanderer's Journal weighs."

I only meant the acid, I've no idea what you're talking about. How could you question the lord of shades intentions

No, sorry, they can't keep going. The Knight can't physically laugh but they can give up, dropping the quill to put a paw on the side of their mask.

"Uuuuuuuugh."

This noise is growled through both hands, because his face is firmly pressed into them again. Lemm dully considers sticking out an elbow and shoving them off the counter.

Instead he just smooths his hands down his face and folds them under his chin, fends off the embarrassment - this is easier because, unusually for him, it feels like he's in on the joke - and sighs.

"Amendment to the record: heretofore 'Lord of Shades' hereafter to be referred to as 'Sewer-Dredging Menace' throughout; refer chapters two, five, and six."

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